Thursday, September 02, 2004

what's in a name...?

i'll tell ya(cause apparently i can't talk enough about codiene (i always do this, i love some band, but then go months or even years w/o listening to their stuff, then one day i bust out one of their cds to listen to while doing the dishes or whatever, and i remind myself why i like em in the first place, so i binge like a fucking crack-baby on their shit for like a month or two, then go another year or whatever w/o listening to em, ad nauseum)).

also, i kinda figured out a way to describe what codiene sounds like. they sound like coldplay would if they fired their keyboardist, told the drummer to mistreat his kit a little bit, told the guitarist to crank up the distortion and do away with all the pansy-assed effects, and the lead singer suddenly started hating gwyneth and their kid. my wife hates this comparison, because she hates codiene, and likes coldplay. i like coldplay to, i just liked em better when they were called radiohead.

anyways, what this line means to me: i always felt like this line describes my life. not so much anymore, cause i feel like for the most part things are finally going my way(say, in the last six years), but in my past. i also liked the smiths' "please please please let me get what i want this time" (or just about any smiths' tune for that matter). "star-crossed" implies that the things that go wrong in your life are beyond your control, that the universe has conspired against you. it's romantic. romeo and juliet were "star-crossed" lovers, and those kinds of people are tragic heroes, and they probably get some reward in heaven or wherever. i mean, right after they rode the arsenic highway, i believe that romeo and juliet were bangin' it on a cloud. they were "star-crossed" or "ill-fated" or whatever. we remember them for this. also, "star-crossed" can be a temporary situation, as the stars move, and hence don't stay crossed forever.

"just unlucky" means your life sucks. nobody gives a fuck. and that's it.

now, again, i no longer feel like this really describes my life. i have a very good life, and am not as mopey and morose as i used to be. i also no longer believe that when you're "unlucky" that nobody gives a fuck. i am surrounded by people who give a fuck, and whom i in turn give a fuck about. but it's still an absolutely great fucking line, hence my new blog title.

in other news, no. 2 got up twice last night, much to my chagrine. and on days when i get little sleep, no. 1 acts like he got little sleep, with much tantrum throwing, weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth, which, in my fragile state is going to get him killed. no, not really, just figuratively.

later on today, i will drag my kids to a special playgroup (maybe someday i will write a blog explaining why i take my kids to playgroups that i have no desire attending and at which they are sure to misbehave), where i will be the only stay-home dad, and where the only women who will even acknowledge my existance will be no. 2's therapist and my case-worker (but to their credit, they go way out of their way to make me feel comfortable). all the other stay-home mothers will look at me with distrust, and shy away, and it'll be kinda like high school all over again, where i will be the odd duck and feel horribly out of place, all due to things that are completely beyond my control...

god, listen to me whine, for fuck's sake! jesus! but honestly, i would like the stay-home moms to be a little more enlightened and accept a stay-home dad as one of their own. i'm a nice guy, i am not a freaky pedophile (quite the opposite, i don't even find most 18-year-olds to be in my parameters), and i am not a stay-home dad as a means for finding women whith whom to have meaningless sex. i chose to be a stay-home dad because i was at a point in my life where it was feasible, and my wife has a decent job, and there you have it. can't wait to start getting to know the punky mothers and fathers of mamatropolis.

but i have pissed and moaned long enough (too long probably), and will call this a day cause i need to go google "nico" and scroll through what's sure to be thousands of pages of bullshit so that my curiosity can be quenched.

darth sardonic

1 Comments:

Blogger nicoshellee said...

eeew play groups! i refuse to do those. in fact when i take my monkids to the park and there are playgroups i sit off by myself with the look "do not even fucking look at me!"

hope it ended up being okay!
we had to go to the kids new school and meet the teachers and tour the school. fun fun. it wasn't as bad as i thought it would be but it was still akward. it seems lots of max's classmates from last year changed schools too. so at least he will know some kids. none of them are in his class though but they will still see each other at lunch and recess.

this school (whittier elementary in ballard) is awesome! we are very excited the kids are going there! just wait till you get to school age with your kids. it is very weird to be going to parent/teacher conferences, etc.....

when we first moved here and had to get morgan registered they treated us like morons cos i didn't know how their system worked! i wanted to tell them "listen fuckers my daughter has been in two different school districts in two different states and they are all totally different in how they enroll, so don't make me feel like an ass cos i don't know how you seattle school nazis do it!" argh they aggravated me to no end. but now it's done and two kids are in school. got one more to register next year and hopefully i will remember what to do!

okay have rattled on enough. gotta clean some more so tomy can watch our kids and aileen's kid.

so later!

3:08 PM  

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