Monday, September 03, 2007

split lip and split tongue...

i am putting my foot down. i refuse, unless it is by my choice, to share my meals with my kids anymore. my youngest could've consumed 20 bowls of cereal, but when i sit down with cottage cheese and fruit, he desperately needs some. i could sit down with a plate full of crawling live bugs on top of rotted fish-flesh, and no. 2 will ask if he can have a bite, over and over and over again.

someone please explain to me how today's skate punks can wear jeans that fit tight everywhere but the ass. how does that work? the jeans look painted on, till they turn around, then you suddenly have this odd urge to show them where the bathroom is and pass them a can of oust on their way there. we did this in the 80's, except that our jeans fit tight everywhere, and we appeared to still have complete control of our colon.

when you are wrenched violently from your bed sooner than you wish by the sounds of your lovely children fighting and crying and wailing in the back yard, if you wish the noises to stop, do not, and i mean do not spray them with the hose. if you want them to quit fighting, it works perfectly. if you want quiet, it sorta has the opposite effect.

which brings me to my next question: how is it that my oldest can come in from outside fucking soaking to the skin damn near every fucking day, but i spray him just a little with the hose, and all he can talk about for the next twenty minutes is how i got his shirt wet?

apparently video games on disc taste good, and little-kid teeth marks cannot be buffed out or filled like scratches. when q gets back, i owe him, along with a new controller (well, at least one, probably two) a couple of games as well. i will also tell him to never leave a game console with us again, as we don't really deserve it.

today is no. 1's 6th birthday. he was born 6 years ago on labor day. today, it is again labor day. us yanks tend to have barbeques and such on this day. i will be doing some cleaning and battling with the kids and drinking too much coffee, most likely, and little else today. we will celebrate no. 1's birthday at chuck e. cheese's (shitty pizza, and more video and arcade games than a simple mind like mine can even comprehend) when his mom gets back.

in just TWO MORE DAYS!!!!!!!!

fuck yeah, felt good to say that.

darth sardonic

p.s. jamie's blog has disappeared. considering what she was going through, this makes me a bit nervous. if anyone has any info, it would be greatly appreciated. thank you.

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3 Comments:

Blogger Fire Byrd said...

oh chucky cheeses take me back when I first used to visit Philly with the boys and we had to go there for hours on the grounds it was heaven on earth..... Right!

Your into hours now..... how exciting is that.

I would think about you but I'd have to censor my thoughts I guess! so i'll just wish you happieness and look forward to hearing from you whenever!
pxx

11:04 AM  
Blogger wakeupandsmellthecoffee said...

Chucky Cheese is hell on earth. Poor you! Happy birthday to No.1 son, by the way. Don't know who Jamie is so can't enlighten you.

1:02 PM  
Blogger darth sardonic said...

lol pixie, your thoughts are your own, do with them as you like! heh heh. i certainly wouldn't be able to stop you even IF it was in my nature to do so. hahaha.

1:31 PM  

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