Thursday, November 29, 2007

more of the same

after clocking myself in on the computers at work, i called out what i always do: "i just need a bank, and a manager's password (managers have to actually punch in their password to clock the drivers in--apparently we can't be trusted on our own)."

"ok." says one of the managers.

then under my breath to s, another driver who has a cool sense of humor, "...and a bottle of pills, some alcohol, a length of rope, a few razor blades, maybe a samurai sword."

s laughed, as i knew she would, then asked "how wood you lige do close todighd?"

"about as much as i would like being mauled by hungry bears, or gang-raped by angry prison guards."

"aboud as buch as you wood lige to be sig? cause i coug mage that happen if you choose to nod close."

my turn to laugh.

lakewood has a seedy, dark underbelly. well, actually, it really isn't an underbelly at all. it is pretty well known. it is called south tacoma way.

last night, i made one of many deliveries that i have made to deja vu (100's of beautiful girls, and three ugly ones) on south tacoma way. i never make it inside. the doorman always pays. ((matter of fact, i have never even been in there on my off time. hmmmmm, weird. me and my buddy s may have to rectify that before we move) and speaking of that, my wife's clearance is done, and gone through, and we should be leaving for florida in early jan. yay!) he always tips really well. occasionally, some of the girls are out front smoking, their near-nakedness blocked by long and heavy overcoats. only once have i gotten to see one of the girls in her "outfit" (or near lack thereof) and that was because she forgot to give the money to the doorman and was actually on stage when i showed up. i lounged around the doorway like a complete perv and then there she was, in some little black thing made of string and pirate eyepatches. oh, and fringe. yes, fringe. she had a really cool tatt on her lower back as i recall...

god alone knows how many of the runs to the motels along south tacoma way have been either "hungry hooker" runs, or pizza to allay a bit of the aftereffects of too many illegal drugs. i have a funny story or two about those that would require their own post, if i am up to dredging up those otherwise-blocked memories. i think one time i was delivering to a small crew that was filming a naughty webcam out of one of the rooms. lots of flashing lights, those silver umbrellas set up, cables running all over the floor, and a nerdy looking guy on a laptop. the lady paying wouldn't open the door wide enough for me to see anything in the vicinity of the bed, and i am just enough a gentleman not to try and look.

another of the drivers delivered to one of the "spas" along south tacoma way. he was lucky they even opened the locked safety cage, heh heh. might've had him pass the pizzas through a mail slot or something.

that is more or less it, today. nothing too exciting. oh, well, except getting everything into place for this move. that is so exciting that right now i can't even deal, so i will tackle that at a later date.

darth sardonic

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Blogger Krissie said...

"how wood you lige do close todighd?"
I had to read it out loud to understand it. Like English spelling is not fucked up as it is.

10:10 AM  
Blogger Queeny said...

So you're moving to Florida, eh? What part? I lived in Jacksonville for five years. Met hubs there (he's a native) then he uprooted us to the southwest.

I loved Florida. We were 20 minutes from the beach and two hours from Disney. Life was good (better) then. Now I can live vicariously through you (you will still write, right?)

PS I was stumped on "todighd" til I realized manager person was ill.

10:33 AM  
Blogger darth sardonic said...

krissie and queeny, hahaha, sorry for the confusion, but sometimes it is fun to write something that will make you say "wtf?" at first, and "aaah" later. i love reading things like that too, catch 22 was very good for that. some of the obscure references don't get explained until much later in the book. genius.

and queeny, yes i will still write. i will be near cape canaveral. and we are excited as can be.

11:41 AM  
Blogger DJ Kirkby said...

I can't understand what s is saying! Translate please!

5:05 AM  
Blogger darth sardonic said...

"how would you like to close tonight?"

"about as much as you would like to be sick, cause i could make that happen if you choose to not close."

or something pretty close to that, i had to do it from memory, dj.

8:02 AM  
Blogger zirelda said...

You won't be delivering pizza much longer then huh? Will your tat be done before you go or will you go back to finish it?

7:26 PM  
Blogger darth sardonic said...

z-yeah, i will probably tender my resignation prior to new year's eve, and no, it won't be remotely clsoe to done, but i will come back up every so often and get more done on it.

11:27 PM  

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