Thursday, October 30, 2008

on the verge

...of a break-through, or a break-down. not sure which.

when i began this dirty little fly-spec on the world wide web, its main purpose was two-fold: to excorcise the demons that too much free time combined with overexposure to whiney needy kids seemed to mass-produce in my cranial cavity, and to rant at length about the political arena.

but, since writing about my kids and observations is way more fun, and since dubya hasn't really done anything ridiculously stupid of late (well, anything new. he still does dumb shit all the time, hourly, no doubt, but nothing that is making the news anymore), i have been focusing on the day to day of yours truly and his own.

and so here we are, o my beloved non-existant readers, from all areas of the globe, all walks of life, those who knew me when, and those who have never really known me, per se, except what is presented here in the written word; on the cusp of something new in the field of yank politics.

and i have to say, it looks to be dull. dreary. dull, dreary, uninteresting, ho hum, and mundane.

i don't hate or love either of the candidates. i think they will both do an equally mediocre job of cleaning up the immense cesspool that dubya has left (though i am leaning more toward obama, as he seems, on paper at least, to have a plan).

we are days away from having a new president, and, to be perfectly honest, o my beloved non-existants, my droogs and only friends, i could really give a shit.

my predictions for the future: if mccain wins, we can count on at least another four years of iraq war (and a pitch will be made to add, at the very least, iran to the list of antagonists, though i am thinking the list will probably look more like: iraq, afghanistan, iran, pakistan, and any other "stans" that might seem bomb-worthy) whilst "cutting unnecessary spending" (and don't ask me how that works, i am not a politician and have no idea how one can continue a couple wars on foreign soil and simultaneously reduce surplus spending. maybe he means cut back on government grants to schools, and reducing the overages spent on dead and maimed veterans' benefits.)

beyond that, it promises to be four years of dithering, dodging the question, smoke and mirrors, and reminding everyone that he takes a "strong" stand on some vaguely familiar issues that remain to be clearly defined.

if obama wins, he will spend alot of time dodging bullets.

(begin side rant: what the motherfucking fuck?!!!? the us is on the verge of actually joining the 21st century, and rednecks with recently shaven heads and relatively new copies of mein kampf are fucking going to enmire us boldly in the late 19th century with great pride and seig hiel waves of the arms.

seriously?!!!? really?!!? i mean, fucking come the fucking fuck on!! if we are going to pick a misfit child-molester-looking maladjusted criminally insane icon as someone to emulate, can we at least pick one from our own fucking country?

wake the fuck up, you ignorant wasters. anyone who has made a bid for purifying the race, or ethnic cleansing, or anything of that nature was out of their damn gourd and ended poorly. according to wikipedia: "Adolf Hitler shot himself in the head with a pistol on April 30, 1945, shortly before the invading Soviet Army captured his bunker in Berlin." after allegedly taking cyanide. wanted to make sure i guess. "Benito Mussolini was captured by Italian ROYALISTS, who wanted to re-institute the Italian monarchy in power. He was shot, and his body was hung in the main square in a Northern Italian city, along with his mistress," it was rumored that an angry mob beat the living bejesus out of him first. according to another website, "Cambodians wept in disappointment after hearing that Pol Pot had died of heart failure Wednesday in a jungle hut on the Thai border, even as the last diehard members of his vanquished movement were moving toward surrendering him to an international tribunal. (sic)'He deserved to die. I am only sorry that he died so easily without being tried,'" it goes on to say he was being held prisoner at his own house by his own men, who wanted to turn him in to the international tribunal. stalin's "official cause of death was cerebral hemorrhage." followed by speculation that he actually drank way too much, woke up in a bed full of piss, unable to speak, and was neglected by doctors who were afraid of being arrested and sent to gulag until he died.

anyone know any icons these miscreants might find to be "suitable role models" who ended well? i would love to know.

so, to the poor white trash dipshits who insist on holding onto ideals better suited for the dark ages, do us all a favor: take hitler's way out.

end side rant.)

beyond that, he seems to have some good ideas, only about 10% of which congress will actually let him enact, and that begrudgingly.

cause let's face it, o my beloveds, politicians are all glad-handing, baby-kissing, backstabbing, lying, hypocritical sonsa bitches who really could care less about me, the voting john q. public.

i'll let ya know how things turn out.

darth sardonic

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Blogger Sandrine said...

Hi Darth,
I saw Obama when he came in Miami for the democratic panel.He seemed to me the most genuine of all.Also I share his idea on most of the issues.I usually don't speak politic with anybody unless I know that they have the same ideas than me because I certainly don't need more stress in my life (with 4 kids under 9)!Thankfully most people around me are Obama supporters so that makes it easy.Even my mother who leaves in France is rooting for him!
Two millions people have already voted in Miami,it's really amazing.The lines are very long but it doesn't stop anybody.I don't tell people who to vote for, because it's so personal,but I tell everybody to make sure they vote.If you get a chance, check out the Spielberg ad on my blog or youtube,it's pretty powerful.
Regarding racism,there are people in my area that display the confederate flag on their pick up and probably the klan meets not too far from my house.This summer I reread Ann Frank diary and tried to explain it to my oldest kids (7 and 8).My son had a hard time grasping that somebody (Hitler) could do something so evil.He also had a hard time when we spoke about the civil rights movement.I try to prepare them because, being mixed, it is likely that they will be confronted to racism.Of course I am worried for them and I hope that the love my husband and I give them will shield them from the cruelest parts.
I hope you have fun with the kids tonight.
Take care.

6:15 AM  
Blogger Fire Byrd said...

as ever a calm and considered view of the world then Darth!!!!

I would carry on in this vein but having read Sandrine's comment I think she says what needs to be said brilliantly.

enjoy your Halloween.

10:28 AM  
Blogger Krissie said...

Not American = I don't get a say. But I do get a laugh. That I can share.

The citizens of the United States of America

Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.) Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas, which she does not fancy). Your new Prime Minister, Gordon Brown, will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,' 'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (Look up 'vocabulary').

2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U. S. English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.'

3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.

4. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse.

5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler, although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.

8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.

9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. Australian beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They are also part of the British Commonwealth -- see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.

10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie MacDowell attempt English dialogue in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.

11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full Kevlar body amour like a bunch of nannies).

12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the Australians first to take the sting out of their deliveries.

13. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.

14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).

15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.

God Save the Queen!

PS: Share this only with friends who have a good sense of humour (NOT

11:45 AM  
Blogger darth sardonic said...

sandrine-exactly. on the nose. and i am rooting for obama as well. he seems to have his act together better than mccain.

fire byrd-you know me, staid and stodgy, and never one to allow myself to get riled up.

krissie-funny as hell. very monty python-esque.

7:22 AM  
Blogger zirelda said...

Very good and I am voting democrat just because I can't do another four years of this current shit.

7:22 AM  
Blogger Sparx said...

Wow, really - Hitler? You are kidding me - people in the US are still buying that? Mind you I think an element all over the world still buys it. Hopefully they'll all wipe each other out over who is the most pure and let the rest of us get on with real life...

1:13 AM  
Blogger darth sardonic said...

yep, z, me too.

exactly, sparx, so much for the 21st century

2:12 AM  

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