Monday, January 24, 2005

is spongebob gay?

more importantly, who the fuck cares?

remember when that dumb fucking wackjob jerry falwell said that one of the teletubbies was gay? the really funny thing about that was that the purple tubby didn't seem to display any kind of desire to boff his fellow tubbies, falwell just based this on the fact that he was purple and carried a bag. so is barney gay? indiana jones?

but the thing that really cracked me up was that by lobbying that the purple teletubby was gay, he turned it into a gay icon. it wasn't before he said it was.

bert and ernie. of course these guys have to be gay, right? cause they live in the same apartment, and although they have seperate beds, they sleep in the same room. if that is the case, then i, and every mormon missionary in the world along with me, am gay, or at least was while i spread the gospel of jesus christ. it couldn't possibly be that they are two roommates who can't afford a two-bedroom apartment. nah, they are definitely gay.

and again, after all this hype, they became gay icons.

so the latest and greatest is spongebob squarepants. this guy is annoying beyond belief, but he is no more a spokesperson for homosexuality than bugs bunny (cross-dresser who has a thing for bald, short, fat hunters), the justice league (bunch of buff guys in costume who never hit on wonder woman or try to take her out on a date), or snagglepuss (shit, if we're going to use gay stereotypes as a reason for declaring a cartoon character is pushing homosexuality, this guy's got the walk, the mannerisms, and without a doubt the voice!). but i suspect that the christian right has again inadvertantly advanced the gay cause by identifying yet another character to be a role model (or at least a codeword for finding others like yourself) for every young man who is unsure of his sexuality (or who is sure, as the case may be).

i've always felt that if you're looking hard enough, you can find something wrong with everything. i could probably find reasons to say jesus was gay (hung out with twelve other men, and never had sex with a woman (actually, i believe he was married, so that doesn't even work for me, but i throw it out there as an example of how stupid this game can be.)) now, i in no way believe that jesus was gay. let me just get that out there.

but again, who the fuck cares whether these characters are gay, or push homosexuality, or whatever? i know that i don't.

so give it a fucking break, spend more time reading your bible and less time looking for trouble. all you end up doing is pushing people away from your cause.

darth sardonic


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