Friday, September 09, 2005

time for our daily meltdown

yes, fair reader, it seems that lately we have been having a daily meltdown, and now's the time. hold on, sounds like no. 1 might've broken something expensive...

no, he just pulled the tv in his room down off it's stand. it is now stored safely in my locked bedroom. along with the ps2 that he and no. 2 were yanking around while they fought over who got to play the game.

these major tantrums seem to end abruptly upon no. 1's realization that he needs to pee. while he does a fair job of going peepee in the potty, we've made no progress on poop. just now i looked over my shoulder (i was fighting no. 1, who was trying to turn off the computer screen while i was typing) to see no. 1 buck naked and doing the dance.

now he's calm. and i could use a drink.

in other news, the other day i was leaving the place of my employ and walking to my car, and spied a young lady in her vehicle, cutting through the parking lot using empty spaces rather than the lanes of traffic provided. she turned from cutting across the lot onto a regular lane of traffic, and nearly hit a truck, who was utilizing the lanes in their normal function.

now, the thing that cracked me up is this: after they both slammed on their brakes, got their near-accident sorted out, and started back on their respective ways, the young lady was obviously chewing out the truck from the safe confines of her air-conditioned car.

the dumb fucking twat. through her own massive stupidity, she nearly caused an accident, and then, to top it off, yelled at the driver of the truck, who was driving along, minding his own business, and had enough presence of mind to stop his vehicle before he ran over her dipshit ass. i wanted to chase her down and call her a stream of names, just on principle's sake.

and then it slowly dawned on me that as a nation we are the kings of doing something stupid and then blaming someone else. look at this whole louisiana mess. bush was pissed at mother nature. hey, you fucking namby moronic prat, you knew that this was gonna happen for several days, you could have done much to prevent the death, at the very least, of numerous people. you could have helped the people who didn't have the means to evacuate themselves. now, you are forcing people out of their homes at fucking gunpoint!!!! what the holy FUCK do you hope to accomplish by that? "you MUST leave your homes, citizens. then the news won't have any more disturbing photos to air, and maybe the world will forget that i am a completely idiotic and incompetent asshole with a god complex."

pepper the cat sits calmly on the arm of the couch as the world falls noisily to shit all around her. if i wasn't in the middle of a shouting match with my oldest, it would crack me up how calm she manages to stay. that's why i love cats, i am convinced that they would find a nice warm spot and calmly weather out the third world war. the cockroaches, cats, and keith richards are guaranteed to be the only things left after the Big One.

my wife and i go out for new tats tonight: her first, and my third. i am excited. i think she is mildly indifferent.

no. 1 is now happily watching the empire strikes back like his world wasn't falling apart a mere 20 minutes ago. every time he sees one of the star destroyers, he excitedly proclaims "sspasesheeop!" which makes me smile. so if you were concerned that this posting would end with one or all of us in the hospital, take heart, my beloved reader, we'll survive surprisingly well.

(and i always tell my wife that kids are naturally cute for a reason: every time i felt that i would have to kill my kid, they do something funny or heartwarming or they give me The Eyes, and they get a stay of execution.)

darth sardonic

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